Johnny Carson - The Tonight Show - Comic Characters

Comic Characters

Carson played several continuing characters on sketches during the show, including

• Art Fern, the "Tea Time Movie" announcer, whose theme song was "Hooray for Hollywood". Carson once admitted on camera that this was his favorite character, based on late-afternoon TV hosts who would deliver commercials throughout the movie. Each sketch usually featured three long commercials interrupted by silent, four-second clips from antique films. When the camera returned from each clip, Art was always caught off-guard and immediately reminded viewers that they were watching a film favorite. The movies always had unlikely casts and even less likely titles: "Slim Pickens, Patti Page, Duke Wayne, and Charlton Heston in another classic Western: 'Kiss My Saddle Horn'!" Carson originally played the fast-talking huckster in his own voice (as Honest Bernie Schlock or Ralph Willie), and finally settled on a nasal, high-pitched, smarmy drone, reminiscent of Jackie Gleason's "Reginald Van Gleason III" character. The character, now permanently known as Art Fern, wore a lavish toupee, loud jackets, and a pencil mustache. Actress Carol Wayne became famous for her 100-plus appearances (1971–1982) as Art's buxom assistant, the Matinée Lady. While Art gave his spiel, she would enter the stage behind him. Art would react to her attractive body, wincing loudly: "Ho — leeeee!" After Carol Wayne's death in 1985, Carson kept Art Fern off the air for most of the next year, and finally hired Danuta Wesley and then Teresa Ganzel to play the Matinée Lady. Carson also used these sketches to poke fun at the intricate Los Angeles interstate system, using a pointer and map to give confusing directions to shoppers, often including points where he would unfold the cardboard map to point out, via the appropriate picture, when the shopper would arrive at "the fork in the road". Another freeway routine in the same theme centered around the fictional "Slauson Cutoff". Art Fern would advise drivers to take a series of freeways until they reached the Slauson Cutoff, and would then advise them to "Get out of your car, cut off your slauson, get back in your car," often followed by peals of laughter from the audience, led by McMahon.
• Carnac the Magnificent, a turbaned psychic who could answer questions before seeing them. (This same routine had been done by Carson's predecessor, Steve Allen, as "The Answer Man". The Carnac character and routine closely resembled Ernie Kovacs' character "Mr. Question Man". Carnac had a trademark entrance in which he always turned the wrong direction when coming onto stage and then "tripped" on the step up to Carson's desk. (In one episode, technicians rigged Carson's desk to fall apart when Carnac fell into it.) These comedic missteps were an indication of Carnac's true prescient abilities. Ed McMahon would hand Carnac a series of envelopes containing questions, said to have been "sitting inside a mayonnaise jar on Funk & Wagnall's porch since noon today". Carnac would place each envelope against his forehead and predict the answer, such as "Gatorade". Then he would read the question: "What does an alligator get on welfare?" Some of the jokes were feeble, and McMahon used pauses after terrible puns and audience groans to make light of Carnac's lack of comic success ("Carnac must be used to quiet surroundings"), prompting Carson to return an equal insult. McMahon would always announce near the end, "I hold in my hand the last envelope," at which the audience would applaud wildly, prompting Carnac to pronounce a comedic "curse" on the audience, such as "May your sister elope with a camel!", or the most famous: "May the bird of paradise fly up your nose!"
• Floyd R. Turbo, American (with no pause between words). A stereotypical redneck wearing a plaid hunting coat and cap, who offered "editorial responses" to left-leaning causes or news events. Railing against women's rights in the workplace, for example, Turbo would shout: "This raises the question: kiss my Dictaphone!"
• Aunt Blabby, a cantankerous and sometimes amorous old lady, invariably being interviewed by straight man Ed McMahon about elder affairs. McMahon would innocently use a common expression like "check out", only to have Aunt Blabby warn him: "Don't say 'check out' to an old person!" Aunt Blabby was an obvious copy of Jonathan Winters' most famous creation, Maude Frickert, including her black spinster dress and wig.
• El Mouldo, a mentalist, who would attempt to perform mind-reading and mind-over-matter feats, all of which failed. Often his tricks would include an attempt to bilk money from Ed McMahon or would end with him begging the audience for a dollar, or at least bus fare.
• The Maharishi, whose theme song was "Song of India". This frizzy-haired "holy man" spoke in a high-pitched, tranquil tone, greeted announcer McMahon with a flower, and answered philosophical questions.