Havelock Vetinari - Vetinari's Golden Rule

Vetinari's Golden Rule

Lord Vetinari's political philosophy can be summed up by his belief that what people wish for most is not good government, or even justice, but merely for things to stay the same; the Vetinari family motto is, after all, Si non confectus, non reficiat ("If it ain't broke, don't fix it.") This does not mean that there are absolutely no changes, however; things that don't work are fixed very quickly, even if it does not look like they are at first. In Soul Music, Mr. Clete expresses a belief that "things that didn't work ... got broken." Perhaps in conjunction with this, Vetinari has an interest in keeping things in smooth, simple working order. For example, Vetinari still maintains an ancient department of the Ankh-Morpork government responsible for ensuring all figures of speech have a basis in fact, on the basis that people who seek this kind of employment must be kept busy, or else they just might do anything.

Despite being technically a dictator, Lord Vetinari does not exercise the despotic rule that characterised some of his predecessors. He is, in fact, the archetype of a benevolent dictator, in a chilly, inscrutable way. In The Truth, he permits the emergence of a free press, and has rarely, if ever, been known to have innocent people just dragged off to dungeons without a trial: The notable exception to this rule are mime artists, whom Vetinari despises. Vetinari banned all mime performances from Ankh-Morpork shortly after taking power. Mime artists who violate the ban usually find themselves hanging upside down in Vetinari's scorpion pit while reading a sign saying "learn the words."

Morporkians are, however, in no doubt that Vetinari is firmly in charge of the city; the political system of Ankh-Morpork is described as "One Man, One Vote," in which Vetinari alone is the Man, and he has the Vote. In Making Money, he first appears to avoid meddling in the affairs of private business, but suddenly exercises his executive power in closing several prominent banks for audit at the end of the novel. Also, in Going Postal, while Vetinari could have ordered an investigation of the Clacks company and their financial endeavours at any time, he did not do so until public opinion allowed it, and only then did he proclaim his right as a "tyrant" to launch such an inquiry. Vetinari is broadly tolerant of individual rights, but highly intolerant of people who place their own interests above those of the city. Beyond this, he arranges for useful but problematical people to "vanish" in one fashion or another. Leonard of Quirm (the Discworld's Leonardo da Vinci) "vanished" and now spends his time in an airy attic of the palace, quite happy to continue to invent in solitude and occasionally assisting when the City requires his genius (e. g. during the events of Jingo and The Last Hero). He also recruits condemned criminals with useful skills and traits, arranging for their hanging by an expert hangman who knows exactly how much rope to give a man for them to survive and be enlisted for the good of the city. These are generally offered the choice to work for the city using their unique skills or the "Freedom to take the Consequences." In Going Postal, both Moist von Lipwig and Reacher Gilt were offered the chance to work for the city, but while von Lipwig accepted and was tasked with resurrecting the Postal Service, Reacher Gilt decided to choose the "freedom" of a door which dropped him into a deep pit. In Making Money, Vetinari similarly enlists the services of a remarkably skilled forger.