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“The Christian resolution to find the world ugly and bad has made the world ugly and bad.”
—Friedrich Nietzsche (1844–1900)

“A favorite of outdoor alcoholics, connoisseurs and Fundamentalists, these pills turn water into wine. In 10 minutes the most fetid swamp scum in the forest can become modest red, elusive and light on first taste, yet playful—one might say a trifle impudent—on the afterbite. Saves pack space by eliminating need for bulky corkscrew, decanter and bottles. Store pills on their sides in a cool dark place.”
—Alfred Gingold, U.S. humorist. Items From Our Catalogue, “Wine Pills,” Avon Books (1982)