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    And if tonight my soul may find her peace
    in sleep, and sink in good oblivion,
    and in the morning wake like a new-opened flower
    then I have been dipped again in God, and new-created.
    —D.H. (David Herbert)

    A favorite of outdoor alcoholics, connoisseurs and Fundamentalists, these pills turn water into wine. In 10 minutes the most fetid swamp scum in the forest can become modest red, elusive and light on first taste, yet playful—one might say a trifle impudent—on the afterbite. Saves pack space by eliminating need for bulky corkscrew, decanter and bottles. Store pills on their sides in a cool dark place.
    Alfred Gingold, U.S. humorist. Items From Our Catalogue, “Wine Pills,” Avon Books (1982)